Election Suspensions, "My Pet Goat", and Figuring Out the Media

Reactionary Attitudes Regarding Election Suspensions

Everybody is so up in arms about this whole "the election will be cancelled" thing. I mean, just because the secretary of the Department of Homeland Security talked about it a little, and some Bush appointee on a "federal election assistance" commission said that he'd like to have the power to suspend or cancel elections.

That doesn't mean it will happen. I think it has been fairly well established here in the last week or so that the Constitution specifically gives election powers to Congress and the states. And even then, the Constitution says that the presidential term ends on January 20 rain or shine.

So quit worrying about it.

The Constitution has spoken.

Just like the Constitution's Article II spoke when it smacked down Bush's attempts to steal the election and Florida and the nation went to Al Gore, 43rd President of the United States.

Just like the Constitution's First Amendment speaks when it disallows the infringment on the people's right to free speech and assembly with "free speech zones" that would seek to remove protestors legally exercising their rights.

Just like the Constitution's Fourth Amendment spoke when the Patriot Act was struck down for violating "the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures".

Just like how the Constitution's Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh Amendments spoke when they prevented the government from declaring people "enemy combatants" and denying US citizens life, liberty, and property, preventing speedy trials with a jury, the right to hear charges against them, the right to call witnesses, and the right to an attorney.

Just relax, fellow citizens. These Republicans might be evil motherfuckers, but at least they hold the Constitution sacred. They wouldn't dare do anything unconstitutional.

Right?



In Fairness to Bush: A Look at "My Pet Goat"

Bush's favorite book as a child, according to him, was "The Hungry Caterpillar" (we'll ignore the fact that the book wasn't published until he was in his twenties). That's a book where the caterpillar eats and eats and is always hungry and then eventually that leads to the very positive effect of the caterpillar becoming a butterfly.

But in the goat book, the goat was also eating and eating, but that just made the little girl's dad angry. So it was okay for the caterpillar, but when the goat does the same thing it was bad.

The inequality and injustice of it all.

He was obviously staring off into space as he contemplated the double standards that our society places on certain groups. Perhaps he likened Ken Lay to the caterpillar, and Martha Stewart to the goat. Maybe he was already imagining Saudi Arabia as the caterpillar, and Iraq as the goat.

In any event, I'm sure that "My Pet Goat" sparked a lot of very presidential introspection, and that sort of thing can't just be put on hold for some trifling thing like our financial and military centers receiving devastating blows in the most massive terrorist attack in the US in history.



Discovering the Media's Complicity

I am not a psychic.

You know, that's not a tune that most people have to sing in their daily lives, but I have had to inform more and more people of that fact these days.

The problem is, I knew about Valerie Plame six months before NBC or CNN did. Bob Novak ran his article endangering the lives of countless CIA agents and their operatives and informants. Joe Wilson cried foul.

In a related story, a tree fell in the woods. Nobody heard.

But I read it on Democratic Underground (see links), and I researched it, and I told everyone who would listen.

Half a year later, it was breaking news.

And I had to tell people those five words: "I am not a psychic."

About two and a half weeks ago, DeForest Soaries started making rumblings about cancelling or postponing the election. Then Tom Ridge talked about it again last week. I wrote a letter to the editor about it, even. Only now is it starting to appear in the news, leading CNN this morning. And my best friend, who's just now finding out about this stuff, wonders how I know.

Thinks I'm psychic or something.

I explain to him that the media is for shit these days. He asks why things are the way that they are -- is the media withholding this information? What's going on?

I explain it the best way I know how:

"Look, I knew about this stuff. The information is out there. So if NBC and CNN and the New York Times and the local newspaper don't know about these things, then they aren't doing their jobs. And if they know about these things and they're not reporting them, then they're still not doing their jobs. So take your pick."

He gets it now. I think he thought I was crazy before. Either that, or psychic.